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29th-Aug-2006 11:46 am(no subject)
i like coffee and GG
i love him

but i can never say it..
1st-Jun-2006 09:08 am - 5 more dayysssss
i like coffee and GG

thank god.

hmm...I'm really good right now, like so good. I'm so happy and over everything. I hear all these stories about him and he's so fucked up, it's pathetic but then it makes me disturbingly happy because he's finally suffering and going along with that bitch's game and being rejected..but then it upsets me becaues he's better than that and he deffinaetly used to be stronger than that but I don't know him anymore, he's a tottally different person so it's no longer my problem and I would randomly talk to him to see if he's okay but I'm done with that..I don't care anymore. PEACE.

I really like this boy. Kinda forget his name so oh well. Haha nah I don't want to say his name because I don't know if people should even know with friends and all, whatever. I like him though, it's so weird that I do because we're kinda different and we don't even look good together, he's so tall. haha. whatever though. We talk a lot and I don't know if he feels the same way for me..I think he's just being nice or something. We'll see..it would be a good fling, just something fun. I could use that instead of being a stupid bitch whore and just randomly getting with guys when I'm drunk because I'm kinda over that, it's lame. We'll see what happens, hopefully it'll be good!

I'm excited for this weekend. My graduation party is on Saturday =]. Whoever is reading this that goes to East you are more than welcome to come if you want to. I'm open to anyone coming, my parents are freaking out about the amount of people I invited but whatever. I can't believe we're done, wtf. It went by so fast it hasn't even hit me yet. Oh well, I just can't wait to wear my favorite outfit EVER. Cap and gown. It's probably going to be so long though and just fall on me when I have it on. haha yay. This is a good update, nothing depressing or sad. Nice job livejournal Nicole.

Oh yeah, prom was fucking awesome. Mass and I had a really good time, I was so happy I went with him. It was just really laid back and I didn't have to worry about anything which was really good. I just wish I took pictures with my friends but it's okay we balanced it out. Pictures at Smittys were so random though and awkward..not for the guys but you could deffinaetly tell for the girls haha it was so weird. But the limo ride was really fun surprisingly. I love KP and Carmen haha. Yeah, Katie and I had to sit all the way in the back with this random thing from the ceiling like right at our heads and I somehow fell asleep with all of my bobbypins jammed into my head..it was so uncomfortable, yet I had a good sleep. Post prom was okay, I was so tired and overwhelmed by everything there because there was so much. If we went home and like slept for a couple hours and came back I probably would have actually done stuff but it's okay. The hypnotist guy was insane, haha Michelle and Phil wanted me to do that but I was too afraid I would have to say my thoughts and that would have been so embarassing. But it was something different and it was more fun to watch anyway. Kristin has a video on her myspace from it so check it out haha its so damn funny. The beach was crazy. I was messed up at like 3 'til the rest of the night haha it was great..it's all a blur but so much fun. Lets do it again haha.

This summer is going to be crazy. I'm trying to quit Gaynards because I found out last night that my friend that's been there for like 3 years is quiting and if he is then I deffinaetly should because that's a pretty long ass time. I need a different job that pays better money because I deserve more at that stupid ass grocery store. OH wellllls. K I think the period is about over so until next time...

15th-May-2006 08:47 am - free verse !
i like coffee and GG
i looove this, haha we had to write free verses in english class and i was proud of how mine turned out..

the noisy love partied soft
as an agry acoustic rhymed
within the panicked soul
beneath the mellowed fame
the band's heart through the
fights and money rhythm
away onto the music's guitar heart
and through the loud family
concert melody
9th-Mar-2006 09:09 am - lol
i like coffee and GG
haha my journal entries are so lame.


this is for you partner ;-)
16th-Feb-2006 08:59 am(no subject)
i like coffee and GG
i see that boy too much, just go away...go to freaking west virginia. i hate to see him all the time and to see how differently he acts now..pisses me off. and i hate how the only time i update this damn thing is when i'm pissed off about that dumb kid when i shouldn't even be caring b.c it's been over for so damn long, it just sucks to have to see him still..i'm over it though, i'm fine...i'm sick of people forcing stuff on me like how i should go out with that guy or go to prom with this guy..just chill out and let things happen..i'm freaking though b.c i have no idea how i'm gonna get a date to prom...i thought i was saved but haha yeah..it's exciting though just because you have no idea who'll ask and all that..scary at the same time if no one even asks..damn that would suck..then i would have to ask..ehh...haha whateverrrr..theres this really cute boy who i work with that i really want to hang out with but i'm a pussy and can't ask..hes a freaking junior too and i like freak out..haha patheticcc..ahh so damn cute..jes knows who i'm talking about ;]..i miss lj'ing, maybe i'll start up again..myspace is just addicting and i'm seen that enough on other people's lj's..haha...senior skip day tomorrow :]..getting high and going to shady maple so i can eat 908039842x as much..yay can't wait...tonight will be good too..getting a free dinner at bahama breeze for leos sisters birthday and that place is damn good b.c i went there in florida with my family ahh so good..i love food too much...like its so bad how excited i get about it and i gained weight which is bad b.c i lost so much and i was happy where i was but then agian i wouldn't have been able to give blood which would've sucked b.c i'm happy i did...ha it was my valentine's day gift to myself, the satisfaction of saving three lives..thats so cool though..giving like an hour of your time to save three lives..i don't know, i just think thats cool, i'm happy i did it..it was my first time too so i was freaking out that somethign would go wrong b.c that would happen to me with my luck but all went well..i'm loving this year..it's been so good b.c i finally gotten the chance to hang out with my friends more without worrying about anything and get closer...i'm ready for it to be over though b.c i'm just so excited to move out and go to berrkssss..yesss :]...118 days 'til graduation...senior week is going to be freaking sweet too especially since our house is on 117th street and then there's this other one on 116th street..haha ahhh can't wait..this is such a baffled update..doesn't even make sense..whatever its enteraining for me haha...i wish i could go on myspace here...stupid school...this day is going to be so damn long..i don't even have my car today which is upsetting, i hate relying on people to drive me..i always feel bad...i feel bad way too much..and i give in a lot and i wanted to stop b.c i used to do it all the time and ahh stop negative nicole...my new years resolution was to be more positive..ha i forgot about that 'til now..i guess i should step it up...oh yeah back to prom....i was reading this magazine..i think it was cosmo b.c i was really bored at work since there weren't any cynical bitchy customers at the time..and it said that when it's three months away you should have a date..uhhh three months from sunday! wtf that ish doesn't make sense, way too far away besides the guy would forget by then hahah seriously...i don't want to go with a friend just because i want someone different and spontaneous and hott and fun a good dancer...yeah i'm shallow, but i don't care..it's freaking prom and i want to go all out b.c i never have and i want to get a really pretty dress..i want a short one though but i don't know..it would have to be a really nice short one..and i don't want to pay for it b.c i bought my winter formal dress..even though it was only $20 but still..and my mom hasn't bought me a dress since junior prom so yeah hook me up with that credit card...i'm so excited for prom and its only february 16th haha and i have no idea who i'm going with but whatever still allowed to be excited..i'm happy now...like content happy...i think i'm more confident with myself b.c i don't have to deal with any stress anymore and all that arguing, which is good...i don't know, after i update on this thing or make a blog on myspace i feel better..maybe i should start back on this thing..i hate this stupid class though..freaking web design..i don't understand she gave me like a 74 on a website when i did everything i was supposed to do and when she checked it she said good?..hmm whatever...i'm so lazy now and i could careless about school which is bad because then i'll get grounded b.c my parents were freaking out about my report card haha just because of that stupid math class...i took it expecting to drop it and i can't!..freaking collier told me to take it and said i could because i was going to have enough credits and then he retired..and then when i talk to venditti i can't...awesommeee...oh well its fun though since kglav and stephs in it and we all are just passing haha who cares..well periods over..pieeeceeee ♥
24th-Dec-2005 01:08 am - just felt like writing this
i like coffee and GG
It's upsetting how a person can allow certain people completely change the way he is when the one person who loves him the most can't even make him change his shirt.

19th-Dec-2005 07:56 pm(no subject)
i like coffee and GG
I wasn't ready
How were you?
Don't you remember?
Laying together
Our hands held
We had no worries

I want it back
Why don't you?
Don't you know?
Our lips together
Tasted so good
We were love

I should let go
How can you?
Don't you realize?
There's many others
Only think of you
You were enough

goddamnit have to get over this....how the fuck am i
9th-Dec-2005 12:47 pm - they play my feelings so well
i like coffee and GG
yeah it's over
you can bet in mid October
I will stil be ranting
'bout most early May
Yeah he's a winner
He's a goddamn sinner
While he dines
I'm on the wrong side of the day
And I said
"I don't understand why I'm fumbling after."
You're the reason I cannot forget this season...
5th-Dec-2005 07:29 pm(no subject)
i like coffee and GG
It's too much
I want to forget
These tears are leading me
To a drowning of torture

I'm too weak
My strength is swelling
This sorrow is overflowing me
Into a misery of devastation

Take me away
Hold me
We can last forever
And make it our own dreamer's fantasy
2nd-Dec-2005 01:14 am(no subject)
i like coffee and GG
god fuck this fuck him i didn't want to end like this this is fucking ridiculous i'm not okay i'm so far from it i fucking miss him..why do i miss him if i tried so goddamn hard for him and this is what i get..this is what i fucking get..god fuck you seriously...i feel like my best friend just reached inside of me and tore my heart out and just ripped each part of it slowly into small, little pieces...

..but i still love you
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